Too Bea: Alice in Wonderland

I enjoyed Tim Burton's Alice in Wonderland, don't get me wrong, but I can't help feeling that the furore surrounding it has somewhat eclipsed the film itself. Fashion's gone Alice bonkers, Robbie Williams' new video has a white rabbit theme going on, Mad Hatter Tea Parties are being thrown left right and centre, shops from Claire's Accessories to Selfridges have wondeland pop up shops Below are some of the things that have caught my eye, possibly slightly more than the film itself, which, while it didn't bore at all, didn't really live up to expectation either. and, dare i say it, the 3-D thing - events on screen just stick out a bit. so what? surely something more could have been done with the technology?

Still, the film... Brilliantly epitomising the curious innocent, Mia Wasikowska plays the now 19 year old Alice, who returns to 'Underland' in an altogether darker tale that's Return to Oz meets The Neverending Story by way of The Lion, The Witch and the Wardrobe: a shadowy evil has settled over this once-wonderous land, and Alice, the chosen saviour in the vein of a St George/Joan of Arc hybrid, must save it from eternal doom and restore goodness by battling the bastard child of Alien and Predator: The Jabberwocky...

Given that the Underland framework sees Alice being proposed to in the buttoned-up Victorian era, it's not a giant leap to see the situation in Underland as metaphorical underground battle -ie a battle under her petticoat. The Red Queen, of hearts, a sexualised being with a big red head who controls the reptilian jabberwocky Vs The White Queen, who doesn't like pain, and is white and pure and would much rather study potions than take part in any heated physical activity. There's even a ferocious feline Bandersnatch who chases Alice, scratches her and makes her bleed but which she then tames (by returning his eye to him). Down in Underland Alice has an awakening, and she emerges only to run away from men. Enough said. (A lesbian fable! that would have been so much more fun. perhaps she and Anne Hathaway as The White Queen should have got it on.) But that might be sexing it up a bit much. or not. i sort of had to though, because there's not quite enough going on otherwise to get your teeth into (though it is undeniable lavishly gorgeous to watch, and The Red Queen's court could keep you entertained for hours admiring the intricacies of the heart motif). Still, the strangest hint of sex really happens between the mad hatter and Alice, between whom there's some definite flirting. it's weird. specially weird is the hatter's jubilant dance - the flutterwhack (or something), which sounds distinctly like another kind of physical activity that begins with an F the first time you hear it and which, when you see it enacted, involved flailing limbs to rubbish music (like many a deflowering i imagine).

Curious. refocus on the merch, i say...